I just worked a wedding where they had four people toast. The Father of the Bride, Best Man, and two Maids of Honor. That is all fine… I love a good funny toast. Love the stories of college or trips. And I love to see the faces of the just-married couple during that toast.

In 1989, I was the best man at my sister’s wedding. I got this honor because the then-Best Man and my sister’s soon-to-be-husband got into a really bad fight. So, I was told I am the new Best Man. Great. I was a 17-year-old kid, who at the time was afraid to speak in front of a crowd. So, I asked my English teacher in high school to help me write the speech and practice it. I got a huge extra credit for the year from this need. I remember my teacher saying at the time…less is more. Keep your stories quick. Humor fast. And don’t be boring! FYI, I killed it! Got the laughs when needed and kept my speech not longer than six minutes. Remember that time… six minutes!

Wait, I am getting a head of myself.

Back to the first wedding. So the Father of the Bride starts. Well, he is Dad. He can talk as long as he likes. Right? Well, if we keep to what my teacher told me… no. He did do well. Five minutes was his whole toast. Best Man is next. He was also funny, quick stories and out. Five minutes. Then. Oh, boy. Did the event slow down. Each of the next two toasts took 15 minutes or more. Page after page of notes. You could feel the crowd shift in the chairs they sat in. We took 45 minutes away from a timeline already short on dance time! We still had cake cutting, first dance and both parent dances to do. We ended up with a total of 25 minutes of dance time. The crowd gave a sad groan when I said it was time for last dance.

I am sure you are asking now, well how long should a toast be?

I suggest this. Two toasts. Tell each person short and sweet. Yes, of course Dad can speak. But have him say something short when he does a welcome before dinner. Tell all those who want to do a toast that they can talk longer during the rehearsal dinner.

Again, I love a fun, amazingly-written toast. But remember, time is not on your side during a wedding.

I hope this helps, and see you on the dance floor!